Sometimes I feel like an absolute BOSS!
Other times I have trouble stringing a sentence together... Honestly. It's astounding!
This is what I've been thinking about this week - as we're nearing this year's ABIA awards (Australian Beauty Industry Awards), which we won last year (and are finalists again this year)! There's nothing like a past triumph to make your mind wander and think about the trials and tribulations of the past year - and musings of how you're doing as a human!
By the way, this was our proud moment last year:
So what's the story?
So, in the past 5 years I've done things I couldn't even DREAM about!I took a HUGE risk to build the business of my dreams from absolute scratch. I borrowed (and paid back) an obscene amount of $$ to pay for that dream. Knowing that nothing was ever guaranteed to work and that I had absolutely no freakin idea of what it meant to own or run a business. Luckily I have an understanding husband who believed I could! By the way, here's a little snapshot of what HÜD looked like before we started the works...
I learnt how to be a book keeper, a social media manager, a marketer, a builder, a writer, a handywoman, a plumber, a content creator, an interior decorator, a negotiator, a strategist - and the list goes on and on... I even had to learn how to re write code on our website… (although not well! 😅..).
There are many things I’ve had to learn to do. And I still don't REALLY know how to write a blog - let's be honest!
But do you want to know what the MOST challenging thing I had to learn was/ is?
To be a LEADER.
It sounds simple right?
But in fact, it’s easy to be a MANAGER (for someone with the right experience). But being a LEADER means to drive your team to accomplish more than they even thought possible themselves. To inspire them to BE better and DO better. Smash it out of the ballpark! And that’s not easy!
And the days I feel like I failed at that - those are the days I cannot string a sentence together. The fear of failure sets in. The fear of making a royal mess of everything. The fear of being a SHIT leader. And how can you lead and inspire when you yourself feel that way? It's easy to beat yourself up - even when things really aren't that bad at all. The human brain is amazing - it's much easier to focus on the negative than the positive. I am by nature extremely great at giving myself a hard time and forget about all the good stuff (thank god for neuroplasticity! There's hope yet)!
And then I remember that we all have to learn everything in life. No one is born with all the answers. Pretty much ALL of us (except Trump perhaps 🙄...) have feelings of inadequacies. And I give myself a break.
It's totally ok! I know I'm doing the best I can. I’ve been resilient in the face of enormous challenges. I have continued to grow and develop. I keep investing in my growth and in that of my team. I try to take lessons in feedback and in mistakes and disappointments (some days I do it better than others)...
I've done some MAJOR f#%$ up's (yes this is a thing we do at HÜD - we celebrate f#$@ up of the week...) but I've also created a workplace - a community- where values and purpose takes precedent and People are valued over Profit. A place where people can make mistakes, own up to them - and learn from them... Not a big deal! We all do it... Here is our f#$%@ up of the week board!
So what if I’m a work in progress! That's totally ok.